| A verbis ad verbera.. |
[Aug. 21st, 2005|07:02 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  indifferent | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | 100 Years - Five for Fighting | ] |
I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars
I'm always falling off the face of the earth, only not really. I've decided to add 'ronin' to the tattoo I want to get because it too perfectly describes my life. Live like a ronin and die as a ronin. But hey, it's cool. Live by my own rules and travel the wasteland. Of course it comes with consequences, but I'm not really the type of person you want to get into a relationship with anyhow. I'm moody, spontaneous, way too flirty for my own good, and I don't stay in one place for very long. Did I mention I work 50+ hours a week? Yeah.
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
So, yes. Katherine and I called it off about two weeks ago. She's having some emotional breakdown and instead of allowing me to help her through it, she wants time to herself to think. Which is understandable because of course you need time to get your head together and figure out what direction you want to take in life. It just sucks because in the meantime I'm just.. there. This is the first night in 5 days that I'm actually staying home and not drinking. Not good to be on the path to your own destruction. Easier said than done.
I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way
A family on my mind
I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life
Happier thoughts. I'll be in Los Angeles at this time next week. I'm only staying through Thursday but it's the getaway that I need right now. Just to get out of familiar territory would be nice for a while. This constant routine is driving me crazy. And who knows. Maybe I'll stumble upon something that I might like out there and be tempted to stay. Well, not stay right now, but move back maybe by the beginning of next year. Everything is an option. Besides, there's no Chinatown here.
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star
15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
I don't even know who reads this anymore or who updates. But it's good to just kinda spill all this crap out now and get it off my chest. Not that it was all that much of a burden anyways, but it was there. Then again the more I think about the recent events, the more my stomach starts to hurt all over again. You can't go wrong with Rome: Total War. I think I'll lose myself in that.
Half time goes by
Suddenly you're wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...
I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
So how is everyone? It's been a long time.
15 there's still time for you
22 I feel her too
33 you?re on your way
Every day's a new day...
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
.. Ruka
Edits simply because everyone expects me to say this: My Bucs lost! Dammit. |
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| Excerpt from my update.. |
[Oct. 31st, 2004|04:46 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  numb | ] |
And.. Happy Halloween.
You make me weak
And wanna die
Just when you
Said we'd try
Lovin', touchin', squeezin'
Each other
Am I the only person on the face of the planet that has these stupid messed up working hours? Or maybe they just think we're all machines who don't need rest and sleep but yet expect us to be up and ready to fix the rest of the world when they need help. I need to start playing the lottery. Seriously.
When I'm alone
All by myself
You're out
With someone else
Lovin', touchin', squeezin'
Each other
So yeah. Officially one week of no contact what-so-ever. Yeah. Time heals everything. So why is it that on situations like this that time decides to go so fucking slow? I think I'm getting better. Slowly. I had my nervous breakdown already and got it out of my system. Course work and friends are definitely keeping me occupied and my mind off of it. I'm definitely getting too old for this crap.
You're tearin' me apart
Every, every day
You're tearin' me apart
Oh what can I say?
You're tearin' me apart
I should just go back to RPing Taki and Sephiroth and call it a day. I miss those anime RPs. I miss Yaten and Haruka's toilet paper origami. ROFL YATEN!
It won't be long, yes
'Til you're alone
When your lover
Oh he hasn't come home
'Cause he's lovin'
He's touchin'
He's squeezin'
Another
Damn. Akane Karasuma. Yum. I love her. I LOVE her.
He's tearin' you apart
Every, every day
He's tearin' you apart
Oh girl, what can you say?
He's tearin' you apart
'Cause he's lovin'
Touchin'
Another
Now, it's your turn girl, to cry
That was my update on GJ two days ago but nothing has changed. Except the fact that I'm incredibly hungover. Why is it that relationships make you drink excessively for who knows how long? Because they fucking suck, that's why. Yeah, now I'm bitter. Not enough to ever go straight, but still. Fuck 'em. The shit NEVER works.
I shall now go indulge myself in another fucking beer.
Hello to everyone. I'm sorry I've been so distant but do you really wanna be around someone who is so angry and bitter? Nope. I'm gonna go see if I can find roses, smiley faces, and puppies and kitties and a big glass of sunshine to shove up my ass so I can smile again.
;] WORLD.. fucking SHAKING. |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 10th, 2004|10:22 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  awake | ] |
Hello to everyone. ;]
<333
Ruka |
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| :] |
[Feb. 24th, 2004|08:13 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  calm | ] |
Still alive and kicking. I know most of you are probably upset with me that I've relatively disappeared for the past few months. I assure you it's been for the best. Hopefully I'll have enough strength to gather myself together and you'll have old Ruka back.
I miss you guys.
- R
Edit : Need updated screennames, btw. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 23rd, 2003|03:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | calm | ] |
Muaha. Yoinked from Nicole. :)
Buccaneer playoff hopes are shattered. ._. Dammit. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 8th, 2003|05:15 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  busy | ] |
Once a playa, always a playa.
Flirting is definitely in my genes and it almost caused me to ruin my engagement. But I've gotten back on track again and everything seems to be getting back to normal. Ugh. Why can't I be normal?!
Anyhow.. still alive and kicking. My time online has been rather scarce due to the fact the when I'm not at work I'm spending time with Kim and Nikole. Once we get a schedule going, I'll have some time designated to the computer and all. Things have just been hectic with the holidays and Nikole's birthday coming up.
Hm. What else. Bucs won last week. - Insert audience applause.- :) Umm... my new truck is working out just peachy. :) Went to Miami for a 3-day weekend. :) I think Kim got me a huge tool set for Christmas. :) These boxers feel awesome. :)
And don't hate me. I promise I'll be around more!
Man it's fuckin' cold.
... |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 17th, 2003|07:49 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | calm | ] |
HAPPY MERRY EXTREMELY EARLY CHRISTMAS!
:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Nov. 4th, 2003|10:23 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | calm | ] |
- Licks EVERYONE.- :) |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 27th, 2003|01:46 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  tired | ] |
Marlins win the World Series and Bucs won today. :) Yes, happy times.
Anyhow... wedding has been pushed back to March 6th. I sold my car and am in the process of getting an SUV. ;-; Man. I'm gonna miss that car. It got me 3 speeding tickets in less than a year.
Kim.. I expect a LOT of text messages from you. Cuz you luv me. :)
Dai.. ... do you EVER answer your cell?
Sinda.. I LUB U!
Jenny.. You rule my world!
Nezu.. WHERE R U?
Ex-girlfriends just... suck. And I mean that in a nice way. ^____^ [ Please understand Dai is the only exception to this statement. Wouldn't it be awesome if her and I were back together?!!! :D Muahahah. ]
And now.. I shall go pass out. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 18th, 2003|10:47 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sleepy | ] |
I'm alive.
Bucs won last week. :) Marlins are in the World Series. :)
And I have the flu. :(
That is all. |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 1st, 2003|08:28 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  amused | ] |
Dai. Will you be my baby's momma?
:D |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 20th, 2003|03:13 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  contemplative | ] |
Okay. ( This ) is a pic of what our wedding bands look like. Kim and I got them earlier this week. The lady only took a day to get them in from the time we placed the order. This isn't the exact type, but it's very similar. I think the only real difference is the design of the gold in the middle but it gives you an idea of what they're like. We've also managed to finally get a wedding planner who's got the location of the ceremony reserved for us and everything. It's going to be held at this historic church in Largo, about 30 minutes away. Pretty nice location from what I've seen. We've got the church rented for the entire day and then the reception is going to be at either a hotel nearby or a clubhouse where her friend works. We're still working out the details and all. But luckily, the only thing we really have to worry about is what we're wearing. Man. x_x I wish someone would have told me getting married was so damn difficult.
Allright. I'm deadass tired. I'll be around later, hopefully. I'll definitely be around next week.
I'm having surgery.
... again. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 10th, 2003|04:11 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | amused | ] |
My inner child is ten years old!
The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla
- Coughs.- ....
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 28th, 2003|06:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Forever and for Always - Shania Twain | ] |
Allright. I'm alive. And time for a post.
Things have just been a bit crazy because I've been working some major overtime at work and all and with good reason. Been saving up some money and all to move again early next year. As in, the first week of January. I probably should have said something sooner but I wanted to make sure everything would be going as planned and all before I said anything and it's definitely final and confirmed.
Kim and I are getting married on January 3rd. :)
Yes. Ruka finally will tie the knot. Amazing, isn't it? Someone has actually managed to tie me down for good. But she's incredible and definitely the one. We've met with the lady performing the ceremony, picked out the colors for the wedding, established the venue, catering.. all that other junk that goes with it. o_o; Not sure what all it is. Kim and the best guys and girls are handling that. We decided to each pick a best man and maid of honor for both parties to make it all even out. Man. Crazy how things happened and all but this is it. I'll definitely be around more once things settle down a bit and we get all these appointments and stuff out of the way.
Okay. I'm gonna stop talking about it now because I get all nervous and my stomach turns. x_X But, yeah. I'll definitely keep everyone posted. ^_^
Edit: - Yaten loves men with bowl-shaped haircuts who think they're Peter Pan. ^_^; |
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| (no subject) |
[Aug. 3rd, 2003|06:34 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cold | ] |
Slackin' on the updates. Flu is kickin' my ass.
One thing that would make me feel better is... a YATEN drawing. :) Something with an origami theme. ROFL
- Goes to OD on Tylenol Flu.- x_x |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 29th, 2003|11:56 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | content | ] |
My baby is back from New York.
That is all. ^_^ |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 25th, 2003|08:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | drained | ] |
Soooo... tired.
Can't... type.
- Passes out.- |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 24th, 2003|01:23 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | contemplative | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Unwell - Matchbox 20 | ] |
All day
Staring at the ceiling making
Friends with shadows on my wall
All night
I'm hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good
For something
Hold on
I'm feeling like I'm headed for a
Breakdown
I don't know why
I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell
I know right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy I'm just a little impaired
I know right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be
See me
Talking to myself in public
And dodging glances on the train
I know
I know they've all been talking 'bout me
I can hear them whisper
And it makes me think there must be something wrong
With me
Out of all the hours thinking
Somehow
I've lost my mind
Talking in my sleep
Pretty soon they'll come to get me
They'll be taking me away |
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